This feels a little weird - I'm a night blogger so to be sitting here in the middle of the day and not be procrastinating about something else well its weird. However I also process and think as I write, its something Pastor Clive picked up on with me early on at staff meetings, I find it easiest to respond if I have written notes. Even with exams I have always had to have a computer to type rather than a writer (due to my muscle etc. problems in my hands) cos I just can't seem to put things in quite the same way verbally. (Yes I am justifying shush!).
Anyway the reason I am needing to process is cos I've just got back from church - specifically the ordination of Simon Moetara as a Pastor and Teacher of the Apostolic Movement. After the ordination Simon and Rachael, along with quite a few others, were praying over those of us who felt we are called to fulltime ministry. Simon said one phrase that has given me much pause 'you have set yourself aside for God just as He has set you aside for Him prior to your conception' (wording may be out - meaning is the same).
Somehow that's been playing in my head every since - that I have set myself aside for God.
I have knowingly surrendered my life to God, it often is a daily thing. I have chosen to obey Him. I have a strong confidence that He has called me to be a Pastor within His church. I am doing all I can to grow into that and walk into that. But 'set myself aside', the words somehow resonate within me.
As I write this I now know that its true. I have, in a process I have largely been unaware of, been slowly dedicating all that I am and all that I have to God. I have been setting myself aside, moving away from those things and people that are not of Him and have an unduly large influence on my life, and focusing on God in all aspects of my life. But sudddenly that phrase means even more. It means I now love myself enough and am confident enough in His love for me and delight in me that I consider myself acceptable for His service. It means that I know that in Him and with Him in me all things are possible and I am free to be what He created me for. It means that I now accept that He did set me aside before conception for His delight and love and friendship and service and partnering and oh the list goes on!
Don't get me wrong I don't belive that I am this amazing superwoman or that I am better than everyone around me- NO! Rather I am beginning to grasp just how amazing I am because of Him and therefore, as a result of this awareness, I have a far greater understanding of who others (including YOU) areand how amazing you all are too! By the by I'm really over the false modesty thing we are amazing we do reflect God and He delights in us so...
This really has turned into a ME ME ME blog but hey - I'll post it for your interests sake if nothing else you may have a better understanding of how I tick =).
5 comments:
"I have been setting myself aside, moving away from those things and people that are not of Him"
So does that mean you think I'm not worthy of your time since I'm not a christian or relegious?
Donna
Hey Donna!
NO WAY!!! Not what I meant at all. Just I have had a few friendships (with Christians) over the past couple of years that have really had a bad influence on my attitudes and mood. I haven't stopped being friends with them - I just have stopped allowing their actions and words to influence mine to the same extent that they had been.
For example I have one friend who would always mock the way I studied and the amount of time I would spend helping out at church when I had big assignments due that week. It was done in a 'fun' way but it always made me feel guilty - even though I would still get the work in. So I decided to not allow her to influence me and make me feel that way, distancing myself from her influence. We still get on well but I just naturally avoid her or rather talking to her about some subjects because I know that she will only bring me down.
I have been working to get my priorities right cos otherwise I spend heaps of time feeling bad about stuff that really just wastes my time and energy.
You have always been worthy of my time - more so than a lot of people cos I've known you for like forever - very cool that you actually bothered to read my blog! Have you met Chloe yet - she's gorgeous!!! Apart from Gloria I haven't seen anyone from school for like forever... Heard anything from anyone lately?
luv
Me
I think I understand what you mean. Yeah I met Chloe once. She is really cute. I saw Joanne and Louise at Jo's late 21st. Sarah's overseas at the moment. She's susposed to be coming back up this way for a visit. Maybe we can catch up then.
You certainly have set yourself apart for God...
because you have done this... the sky is the limit for you!
I believe in you! I think that you will make an amazing Pastor and I feel privileged to have you on the team!
Here's a thought:
Say you had all the calling from God and gifting in the world... would any of it mean jack didely if we didn't separate ourselves to God?
I think it is a natural thing to do... we set ourselves apart for that which is loved... a man marries a woman, he sets himself apart; he still mixes with other women in a warm and appropriate manner, but anything that might harm that relationship -- flirting, malicious hassling of his wife -- he 'removes' himself from... it's cool if we can get on with all people, but sometimes the reality is that in life we have to make a choice; him or me? that other woman or me and the kids?
Actually, it's part of the meaning of the word for holiness -- Hebrew 'qadosh', Gk 'hagios' -- "to be set apart"... Well done, Cat; may God continue his wonderful work in your life; may he continue to paint his masterpeice on the tapestry of your life, and to bless his people through your loving obedience and service... :)
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