Its funny how you can almost dread something, make yourself go with a good attitude, and then end up having the best of times... I went out tonight to a friends birthday party and well to be honest I dont really know him or his wife, they are more good friends of my good friends who I have accordingly caught up with a bit this past year or so. Anyway I was not feeling incredibly excited about going - driving to unknown place in dark and rain - and meeting even more new people and having the awkward 'so what are you studying' chats repetitively.
I went. I only got lost on the way twice and refound my way without the map so they dont really count. And it was actually really fun. I came away feeling refreshed, relaxed, happy, and funnily enough cherished. It wasnt the hostess - though she was truly lovely and made me feel so welcome, at home and included that I have to conclude she has the gift of hospitality in spades - and it wasn't even the people as I didn't know anyone else as I expected, it was God. He knew how I have been feeling and somehow through this evening of laughter and joking and community He communicated love to me and I am sitting here just feeling so much happier and valued and just touched tonight.
What is so amazing about this is that it lasted through the drive home which was a nightmare of missed turns, slick streets making the road markings impossible to see, sheets of rain, and poor decision making. I was scared confused and a little panicky and yet now I am warm dry and feeling cherished still. Amazing. Simply amazing. I praise the Lord, I praise God who knows me, loves me, and brings me great joy.
Friday, 27 February 2009
Halls
I have finally moved cities and well its a shock to the system and it isnt... the hardest thing is being too far from friends to go 'I'm feeling lonely/bored/confused/hurt/happy' and share it with them in person yet with communication services it is easy to still keep up relationships and I could just drive down if I really wanted to/could afford it. It's weird, having the same support networks and stuff just not the same face to face physical experiences of that.
The thing I am most nervous/excited about is finding a church to plant myself in (this sentence to imply not self reliance but yeah too tired to rephrase). I have met heaps and heaps of people in the Halls and college but am yet to feel any instant connections with anyone and thats made me wonder. I dont think I had considered that before moving up I guess I must have just subconsciously thought that the Halls was going to be a multicultural equivalent of my church and that I would naturally be drawn to the people here. I'm not. It kinda makes sense now that I think on it but it has challenged me a bit. In a church - even a large church - people of like minds and similar worldviews generally congregate, I mean not everyone gets along or is exactly the same but in general they have to have similar perspectives on lots of things otherwise the church body would always be in conflict and major upheaval. At a bible college people are drawn together by a mutual desire to learn about God and how to serve Him but beyond that we are studying a variety of things in a variety of life stages with very different beliefs and worldviews and so for everyone to click straight off would be weird.
That said I will continue to work at building relationships but it will be work and intentional and thats not what I was really expecting I guess... hence right now a church I could feel more at home in is a definite priority.
The thing I am most nervous/excited about is finding a church to plant myself in (this sentence to imply not self reliance but yeah too tired to rephrase). I have met heaps and heaps of people in the Halls and college but am yet to feel any instant connections with anyone and thats made me wonder. I dont think I had considered that before moving up I guess I must have just subconsciously thought that the Halls was going to be a multicultural equivalent of my church and that I would naturally be drawn to the people here. I'm not. It kinda makes sense now that I think on it but it has challenged me a bit. In a church - even a large church - people of like minds and similar worldviews generally congregate, I mean not everyone gets along or is exactly the same but in general they have to have similar perspectives on lots of things otherwise the church body would always be in conflict and major upheaval. At a bible college people are drawn together by a mutual desire to learn about God and how to serve Him but beyond that we are studying a variety of things in a variety of life stages with very different beliefs and worldviews and so for everyone to click straight off would be weird.
That said I will continue to work at building relationships but it will be work and intentional and thats not what I was really expecting I guess... hence right now a church I could feel more at home in is a definite priority.
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