1 month in

It's been over a month and well even just reading my last blog is kinda amusing. It feels like soooo much time and thought has passed and everything is progressing full steam ahead. Nothing is as I thought it might be. I, like many others I suspect, have been guilty of daydreaming about 'the one' for years. Not that I actually believe there is a perfect 'one' - I believe that we choose to love someone for a lifetime and we keep choosing to do that for the rest of our lives through the good and bad times. Some people are easier to love than others is all...

Anyway I digress. Thing is I never considered what it might be like to date someone I have known for years, have seen their character be shaped and formed, have enjoyed a close friendship with, and just, well, know so well. I am definitely learning new things about him every day but I am already confident in his being who he says he is. I've seen his loyalty, his faithfulness, his generosity and indeed his faults and flaws all within the context of several years. I've seen them without the disadvantage of rose coloured glasses (which I am surely wearing now!) and I have been impressed. That alone gives me huge confidence in our future. It allows me to consider the future now rather than needing to wait longer to see who he is within the great discernment of time.

I never considered this option so now I'm floundering a little. What is too fast? What is too slow? What is best for him? For us? For me? What does God ask of us in this situation? Nothing like being out of ones comfort zone though for forcing reliance upon God!

And I am sooo grateful to God. He has brought us to this decision making point, He has guided our steps, He has helped form me into a woman confident in Him and able to stand up for what I believe in with the strength to follow His will, He has moulded our relationship right from the start and He is the connection that brings us together. God alone can ease my uncertainty, insecurities, fears and frustrations and unlike others He is ALWAYS with me. So I praise and thank and love and depend upon you God more now than ever!!!