Today

Saw someone else's blog this afternoon and feel rather inspired again to take stock of where I am now. It's funny how much of a rollercoaster ride life can be. I came to college with so many mixed motives. I was semi sure God was supportive of this move - my first real departure from friends and family for a long term period of time - though I worked pretty hard at convincing myself and others of this. Thing was I knew I was in a rut and that something drastic needed to happen. Well moving has been drastic and mindbending and challenging physically, mentally and emotionally... I have also re-learnt the lesson that you truly take your issues with you lol. The good thing is that they generally become a lot more obvious to you when they hit hard the second time round, well they do for me, and the opportunity to work through them is always open with God.

In the pressure cooker of change old 'conquered' patterns of sinful actions rear their heads, fears, inadequacies, hates, loves all come into focus... It's been a process of refocusing again, realising yet again how much I need to rely upon God and trust Him to direct the process, and going back to the basic truths and steps of my faith. The scary thing is I'm slowly starting to get comfortable again and so I need to learn this time round how to stay on track in the comfy spaces as well as the painful/stressful/confusing ones.

I'm happy in a church, in a few communities, in my workplace, I'm working away at this study thing, I think I have direction and vocation a bit clearer, I'm working on me 'n God and He is def working on me! There is definitely stress going on but it's mostly ok. Weird. Come September the worst of the intense study will be over for the year with only a few pieces of assessment left... thats only 2 1/2months away. I wonder what He will throw at me next???